Sunday , October 2 2022

More food for our food


This week we watched our country lose its collective mind when the hardware giant Bunnings determined that each bow should be placed under the sausage from now on. Obviously, this is a measure aimed at reducing the reduction in the number of deaths in the ark, and only time will show how successful this will be. However, that's what we thought about the Aussie food faucet dog, those little things that lead us to pubs, restaurants and taverns. NATAN DAVIES and the designer PETER MACMULLIN looked at each other.


You see, we realized, there's only so much space on the board. Why should you take the salad instead of covering our cabins with a hot spit of chicken breast and to be totally silly when they reach your table. This is an obvious stance that shares more than 7,000 members of the Facebook page called Stop Putting Parmis / Schnitzel at the top of bloody chips. Also, it is a parma, not a parma. Do not force us to cancel your SA visa.


Those of us over 40 will remember those halcyon days, back in front of the Internet and the Kardashians, when shops put the sauce into your pie. Yes, they stuck that little nozzle through crispy cakes and gave you some good conflicts of the dead "FREE". We are pretty sure that no one died because of that, but we are pretty sure that something in the ocean died after eating one of those plastic bags that had the courage to charge you 20c. Free sauce is an Australian birthday, it's in our constitution.


Sometimes, really long ago in ancient Mesopotamia, someone discovered that you can put clay on the wheel and make a plate or dish. It was a really good idea that served well about five years ago when some smart pants decided to ignore 20,000 years of common sense and serve the hamburger on the board. Wood plates are essentially synthetic sponges, and even worse there is no edge to reputation and orange juice stopping to go to your newspaper. Do not start drinking us in jars.


Why does the barista carefully extract the precious juice from rare beans grown in Ethiopia before joining it professionally with the perfect cottage organic cow milk, but the poor old teapot gets a cup of tea bags and bags? Worse, they often pay almost the same amount of coffee shoppers. Is it right to lean the tea that really wants too much?


Kekeri say, "How's everything?" The answer will always be: "It's OK, thank you."

Meter-long milled pepper.

Around the roll for people who love a well-made steak. This is our meat, now we burn it.

Communal tables. We already have enough friends, thank you.

Payment for bread.

Ordering a complicated cocktail in a pub where everyone else just wants beer.

Back to grill – the next time you "suggest" that steaks should turn, you will be on duty.

Ten dollars a bottle of water. We do not care if there is a specially trained braid with the crystal-clear streams of northwestern Tasmania, it's still just water.

What are your food? Give your words below …

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