Ariana Grande has little memory of the months after the tragic death of her former boyfriend, Mac Miller, and of his separation from the promised Pete Davidson after drowning his pains with alcohol.
He No Tears Left to Cry The hitmaker was devastated last September after the apprenticeship of rapper Miller, who died for a drug overdose, only four months after separating.
She had already continued with comedian Davidson, but her romanticism sank as she struggled to face the premature loss of her ex, and her commitment to October was broken.
The bad guy that made Grande was realizing that he needed to spend some time after years of skipping a relationship to the other.
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"If I am completely honest, I do not remember those months of my life because I was so drunk and (b) so sad," explains Vogue magazine
The pop superstar turned to music to help her heal and free herself Thank you U, next Six months after its launch in 2018, Sweetener.
"I do not really remember how it started or how it ended, or how suddenly there were 10 songs on the board," Grande says.
"I think that this is the first album and, in addition, the first year of my life, where I realized that I can no longer spend time with myself, just like me."
He continues: "I have been booed (coupled) all my adult life. I have always had someone with whom I would say good night.
"So Thank you U, next It was this moment of self-realization. It was that awful moment of, "Wow, you have to deal with all these things now. No more distractions. You have to heal all this … "
A part of his trip to the recovery was to push himself to a tour so he could connect with his fans, but although it may seem that he has all together at the stage, behind the scenes, He insists that he is working hard.
"I am a person who has gone through a lot and does not know what to say about anything, not to mention the world," agrees Grande.
"I look at the scenario as this entertainer, perfectly polished and fantastic, and then in situations like this (behind the glitter and glamor), I am only this small pool to discover."
And, although playing a great sense of peace live, his participation in some of his most emotional songs, especially those inspired by Miller, has been hard.
"It's hard to sing songs on such cool wounds," he explains.
"It's fun, it's pop music, and I'm not trying to sound like anything but these songs (from Thank you U, next) for me they really represent some heavy s … "
"He is very consuming," adds the grief he experienced as a result of the shocking death of his ex.
"In any way it was the one we had perfect, but, how, f … He was the best person ever, and he did not deserve the demons he had. I was the tail (in the relationship) for so long time, and I became increasingly less … sticky.
"The pieces have just floated".
The old couple dated two years before calling on their departure at the beginning of May 2018.